Louis Gohmert Has Had It: No Gay Space Colonies! (VIDEO)

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If the GOP is looking to rebrand itself, why doesn’t it just change its name to Westboro Baptist Party. Both platforms are basically the same: Ignorance. Intolerance. Incomparable stupidity.

Take Republican Congressman Louie Gohmert from Texas who, as reported by Right Wing Watch, went on the House floor yesterday and said the apocalypse is coming because of gay rights.

Is it any wonder people call this man “Goober” behind his back?

Okay, there are plenty other conservatives claiming they should not be forced to bake cakes or sell pizza and flowers to gays, I know. What makes Goober, err, Louie “special” is believing that lawmakers are being forced to decide “whether humanity would go forward or not” striving for gay rights.

Yup, this loony-tune actually said that out loud, in Congress. Our ears hurt.

Louie went on to say that our only survival options would be to throw some people into a “spaceship that can go and plant a colony somewhere where humans can survive a disaster. You know, just like they did in that movie “The Martian” starring Matt Damon. One thing though: in Louie’s world, NASA would never send a gay person into space to colonize Mars.

Oops. Does Sally Ride ring a bell, sir?

Watch courtesy of Right Wing Watch:

Oh Louie, Louie, Louieee, may I suggest a NASA refresher course? A trip to Disney Space Mountain? If you weren’t from Texas, I’d tell you to go back to school. Unfortunately Texas places 43rd in education ranking of states nationwide, so forget that.

Here’s the Wikipedia scoop on Sally: A physicist and astronaut, Sally Ride joined NASA in 1978 and became the first American woman in space in 1983. And guess what, Brother Louie, she was gay. Yes, she was a lesbian who went in space. And while Sally was very private in and about her personal life during her life, her obituary revealed her partner of 27 years to be a woman.

Okay, folks, now you understand what I meant about Louie being so damn special. Not only is this man stupid, he’s dumb.

Louie even created a fantasy scenario for the House members: if we had 40 people to choose from for a spacecraft that would save humanity, how many of them would be homosexuals? Though, he didn’t seem to consider how many of them would be botanists like Damon’s character.

“You’re wanting to save humankind for posterity, basically a modern-day Noah, you have that ability to be a modern day Noah, you can preserve life,” he said. “How many same-sex couples would you take from the animal kingdom and from humans to put on a spacecraft to perpetuate humanity and the wildlife kingdom?”

In the world according to Louie Gohmert, the only reason to have sex is to procreate. Maybe that’s why he’s so angry. He’s not getting any anymore.

In all seriousness, way down deep in Louie’s vacant mind and empty heart is the belief that the “natural order” is being attacked, as well as religious freedom. Because gays.

“We don’t have much longer to go,” Louie predicts.

Oh that gloom and doom of dumb.

You know what, I have a terrific idea. Texas should ship their Congressman Louie Gohmert off in the very next Space Shuttle to Mars.

One small step for Texas, one giant leap for America!

Featured image: Screengrab.

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